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Episode 2: Phone, Keys, Wallet...

Updated: Oct 14, 2020

Listen to the episode here.


Welcome to the art of falling asleep. I'm Derek Lacey and insomnia coach. I created this podcast so insomniacs could have a space to come and feel guided. I feel like I know you and can share some concepts that I wish people had shared concepts that integrate sleep with every aspect of your life, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I believe sleep is not me. Any other setbacks are the artist. Artifact is your canvas, and I want to help you express yourself using the insights from my sleep coaching practice and my own journey out of the sound and by sharing transmissions, that help you bridge the way you experience life better.

What an interesting time to be starting a podcast, especially about sleep with so much going on in the world right now, and just about everybody on the planet being affected in some way. So in this episode, I want to jump right into what's happening right now and not the details so much, but the energy that is a net result of those details and how that energy is likely affecting your sleep. It's not the details, but the energy that's being felt collectively. I think this is what I've gathered from the multiple conversations I've been having with people for the first time ever life throughout the world is taking place in unison. We've never had so much in common with everyone else in the world, which can feel very nourishing. If you're tapping into the joint awakening of consciousness right now, it's going to feel really good.

You personally are probably also discovering new beliefs about yourself because of all the questions that you've had to ask, and you are contributing to this upgrade in humanity. That's taking place. So tapping into that energy field can feel really good, but there's other energy that's, available to us unknowingly. And you know, even if it's the energy field created by other people, other good people going through the same evolution as you are, but using a different scope, they're seeing the world a little bit differently. All of this is creating this knowing energy field that we become attached to in all, because nobody's really to blame, but the world is shifting so quickly. We are seeing all these layers and layers of skin being shed. As people adapt and find new ground in order for them to react to the changes taking place.

We are all confused as hell and or at some point, maybe you, you stand really clear right now, but it didn't come without having to question a lot of the things and experience fear of some kind of fear of a virus or of stability or lack of freedom. And in the process, you know, everything that's been happening in 2020, I just thought about everything that's happened. It's crazy. And as a result of all of this, we are universally feeling the triggering and reactivation of underlying emotional experiences of the collective. So there's this energy field that you can't see, but you can feel like turbulence. You can feel it and it's tense, but unlike turbulence that will actually move and shake your body. This energy field composed of the collective field of, of fear and uncertainty and shame. That is the under current of communication. And our reactions to the events are not moving.

You physically, it's the opposite. They're paralyzing you. So it's really mysterious. You don't know why you can't move. And this is what I'm hearing from people right now is that they don't know what to do. They don't know how to move forward. Don't know how to respond. I don't know how to think or what to think rather. I don't know what action to take, what to believe, who to believe. And this is all independent of what your outlook is or your belief is how you're seeing the world, because it's the language that's being used. That's intersecting into the energy field as if you were getting secondhand smoke. Only. You're getting second hand fear in shame.

And that's the point of this episode is to take this division in the universe and the confusion that's collectively being felt, or just the disruption that's collectively being felt. But at its source is mostly from misunderstandings. I'm not talking about the wrongdoings that are taking place or the amoral behavior. I believe this energy field is, is created mainly by the good people that are seeing the world differently. So I want to help you separate from that. Whether or not this resonates with you, if you really just think about the, the rapid shift that's taking place in the world, we haven't had enough time to comprehend it and allow it to make sense to the body. I'm guessing most of you didn't see this coming.

We're halfway through 2020. And you know, for me so far in my life, every year has had surprises. That's part of the process. You know, a surprise is coming every, every new year. I, you know, I, I imagine what's taken place the year before and I intellectually and intuitively understand that things are gonna happen, that are gonna shock me. And because I understand this because you understand this, the physical body and the nervous system while taken aback, don't fall so far behind that they can't eventually catch up and keep pace. Right now. It's like we are trying to process the events and surprises of 20 years all at once. That's why it feels so debilitating, so difficult to act and think or sleep.

So the first thing I love for you to take in is the realization that you are affected by energy right now, and that you, the person, the body and the soul are okay, you are perfectly fine. What happens with emotional resistance to sleep is that we become tuned into a particular energy field and then to manage, we try to navigate within that field in order to find sleep. I think of an energy field, like a radio station in a world where the radio is always on. And by default, you're always listening to something. Remember we're electrical beings. So not only are we influenced by frequencies, but we are grounded to them. We have to be it's by design, that we cannot operate independently of frequencies. These frequencies guide our thoughts and they influence our emotional behavior. And the influence of the frequency also kind of just depends on the history of your nervous system.

This is important to understand, because when you don't realize that you were under the influence of energy fields, you can feel a deep sense of responsibility for feeling that energy as if you did something wrong to cause it, and especially if the energy field is one of lower consciousness, like anger or a fear or shame, you're going to take it personally, which will lead to what I call sleep inertia, which is that feeling where you lay there and you, you just don't know what to do, or even sleep apathy where you know what to do, but you just can't bring yourself to do it all such very strong feelings. When in reality, the emotions driving, these feelings aren't even yours. They didn't come from you.

What you were feeling right now. It feels like you have been destabilized by the state of the world or the events in the world is it's just energy, which means that you don't actually change at all. Almost not even a little bit. And that's probably the biggest joint misunderstanding with emotional sleep in the new world. And I say the new world, because sleep is more dynamic nowadays. It compared to how we evolved as sleepers, we have more, there's more stimuli. We have more options for choosing an adventure other than sleep, right? It's there's information spinning the globe 24 seven. And we are constantly connected to that information unless we consciously do something to disconnect from that.

And even then, if we don't realize that there's an energy field caused by this dynamic, we might think that we are the ones that have to change in order to sleep. But we don't, we don't change who we are. We just dial into the, to the appropriate radio station. And then we become changed by that energy. And this is the concept underneath this episode. I want to, I want you to become familiar with, with sleep concepts. There are just another way of thinking about something that makes more sense to how sleep takes place biologically, but that also makes sense to your thinking brain. So that the way you think and the way your body experiences life can kind of become one in the same. So from, from this concept, from the sleep concept, a statement like I am stressed, or I am anxious, or I'm confused is actually inaccurate, but it's lovingly inaccurate because I say lovingly, because it's, it's, well-meaning love, wants it to be accurate. So that, so that you can feel like there's something that can be done about it.

When I acknowledged I'm stressed. In theory, that reality presents me with a number of solutions. Don't don't get me wrong. I know that's, that's the reality. Yes. You feel them. I'm just speaking on behalf of the concept. But from this concept, you feel them like you would feel somebody's hands over you or feel, sound, or hear sound. You are not actually those things. You're just in tangled with the energy of those things. Therefore they aren't your truest reality, but a perception that you happen to be feeling the most with your body. And this is what allows you to release from them. Even if it feels difficult or is difficult, it may feel difficult, but it's still technically possible because you are not it. And the more you contemplate this and see that fine separation, the easier it will become to find a new frequency. So you can play with it this way. It, you know, to remember this concept, changing energy frequencies is more effective when going to sleep rather than trying to change who you are being within that frequency that is currently holding the energy of the collective lower States of consciousness. There are limits when you were trying really hard to get out of a stress state by just trying to create calm without tapping into the, a different frequency. So how do you do that?

Well, it could be as simple as choosing a new frequency, the awareness, like, I, I know this happens. That's the point of, you know, that's another point of this podcast by entertaining the concept. There's a part of you independent of your thinking that hears that and puts, puts the practice of that logic to use biologically. So like maybe take a deep breath. I realized I was kind of out of breath that wasn't really a deep breath. Um, but there's a part of you that has already become a better sleeper by entertaining the concept of not us changing, but there being different frequencies that create the change in us automatically. So that can work. Sometimes the approach has to be more artful. So I want to share a concept, a metaphor that I hope can help you relate to taking what seems to, to be stuckness, to feel like stuckness in sleep or in any moment, any area of life and change what that feels like just by finding new air, finding a new frequency.

And before I do that, I want you to know that by being here, when I talk about doing something in order to sleep better, some people think of these asleep tricks. I think of it as conscious muscle training, I do not advocate or embrace the practice of me sharing something to help you sleep better. If it's not grounded to the science of sleep, into conceptually upgrading the way you thought about sleep before, this is what I've found is crucial for insomnia transformation is for you to do something and sleep become more autonomic. And that's the real value of what I call an artful sleep concept versus a tip or a trick.

Another way of saying it is that I want to help take a sleep tip and apply consciousness to it so that by practicing it, it will help you become a more skillful sleeper. Okay? So the concept I want to share to help you upgrade your frequency is something I call phone keys, wallet, and I'll add some context to this. I, Derek Lacey, I'm a very absent minded person. You might call it absentmindedness I call it, my imagination likes to take breaks from reality. And sometimes this gets in the way of me remembering to do things. So this is something I've done a couple of times in my life. Like I've gone through drive-throughs for food and paid for the food and then left without actually getting the food and then realizing it, you know, 10 minutes later. Um, so, uh, and so when these things happen, I'm just like, you know, I, I go through that process of like, Oh, you've done it again.

Right? And there was this one time I, I did something similar. I was flying home for Christmas and I drove to the, to the airport very early in the morning. And it wasn't until I parked my car in the garage and started walking towards the elevators that I realized, Oh, crap, I don't have my luggage. I didn't, I didn't pack my luggage. Mind you, this was a Christmas trip. So I had tons of guests for the family in there. So it worked out. I ended up catching my flight with my luggage and for this to work out, I had to go from being helpless to making a few phone calls and coordinating, you know, somebody to drive to a friend's house, to get my key to my place, and then go pick up the luggage from my place and bring it to me. It was, it was the favor of the year. Now, if I didn't have my cell phone on me, this will not have worked out. Like it, it just wouldn't have worked. The cell phone was the opener of solutions.

So I figured that for me, from this point on the best way to manage my forgetfulness, this was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. Like, dude, you got to stop doing stuff like this. So the best way for me to manage that was to be in the practice of, of not just always having my cell phone, um, but coming up with other things. And in this case, it was like my keys and my wallet, because I've locked myself out of my place before I've gone to meet friends for lunch, and then I don't have my wallet and then they have to pay for me. And it looks really suspicious when this happens, like more than once.

So I came up with this little, like Macerana dance of, of phone keys, wallet, and I'm sure I'm not, I know, I think I've heard that other places I'm not taking credit for that. Uh, I think everybody does this in some kind of way, right. Because you know that, you know, and I knew that if I had my, my phone and my keys in my wallet, I can get out of any Jan using logistics and creativity. So, um, let's, let's set up a scenario here. I want, I want you to, I'd like for you, I invite you to imagine a character who is not you, and imagine this person as part of a social experiment, being placed in the middle of a, of a big city that they aren't familiar with without their phone, without their keys or without their wallet or purse, the modern human just dropped off in the middle of, of, of a strange downtown would probably feel helpless.

Imagine though, if you gave them just one of those three things, if you gave them a wallet, see what it looks like for them to go through that process of making progress. Maybe that's buying a phone, buying a car, buying a bus ticket. Um, or if, if you gave them just a phone, then you could kind of picture them, making things happen, using their phone, right? Because a phone could make anything happen as long as it had battery. But then if you imagine them getting all three of those things, now you can really see this person going through a big shift. They will not only know how to get back home or get to where, um, uh, to a place that feels more comfortable, but they might even use the momentum that shift and experience of finding a new frequency to go have fun, to go to a museum, go to a restaurant they've never tried before for lunch, or just kind of like say, Oh, what the hell?

And get lost, enjoy that experience of, of losing themselves in that moment, knowing that they have the resources to get, to get back to where they need to be. What's happening here in this visual is that their access to creativity and their experience of this downtown is even greater than if they had never lost possession of those three items. What happens now that you are giving them these things is so much more expansive, but let's just say that they were handed a phone, only a phone. Notice the difference in frequency available to them. Now watch them go from helpless to having a phone and notice the creative upgrade and thinking and how it's just the perception of the phone. It's not the actual phone, but the perception of the phone that's tuning them into this new frequency or radio station. As we described it earlier, we are born with our own internal sets of phones, keys, and wallets.

These would be safety breathing and thinking, breathing and thinking are the more autonomic resources that are always there. And then safety. It's just something that you have to discern, but this is good because it can help you reassure that you are indeed safe. Sometimes subconsciously with insomnia, we feel, we think we're unsafe and it helps to discern this and realize that if you were an actual danger, the action indeed would not be to sleep. So to use this method of phone keys, wallet, to find a new sleep frequency, it's helpful to inventory these three resources, but then do them in that particular order, which starts with safety and then moves to breathing and then moves to thinking most people feel they can't sleep because of their thinking. And then it's from that same lower frequency of why can't I sleep, that they try to come up with creative solutions.

And this is of course, and the art of falling asleep is still about using thinking. It's just that the creative thinking takes place after establishing safety and your breathing. It's just a default consequence when you establish that it is okay to be you exactly where you are, and then breathe that reality into your internal perception, using whatever kind of mindful breathing that feels good to you. You will go through the same shift in reality, as the person that was stranded, downtown being handed a phone, went through your thinking will now automatically be different. It will be more insightful and more intuitive.

And that's, that's the, that's how we're using this metaphor to be brought in by this new frequency, not to push ourselves to the frequency, but these three things that, because they are already there move us on our own behalf. They do the moving. We don't, we don't do any moving. We don't change. Now. Here's how we're going to add a splash or an accent of paint. Most sleep logic uses the concept of breathing to induce relaxation. But when you slow down and take a more artistic approach, you'll see that breathing has opened up creativity, which is just like energy that has to be spent so that you can cross over to the other side so that you can sleep.

So just notice what this looks like. You are, you are now in a new frequency after finding your phone and your keys and your wallet. And now you can use the creative energy. That is a result of this to access an intuitive concept or an internal belief that essentially becomes your sleeping pill. And so this is what this could look like. You establish that you're safe, you breathe mindfully. And then with intuitive thinking, you see, or you feel what you couldn't see or feel just five minutes before. And it's a feeling or a site that gives you enough clarity to be released into sleep.

This would be your, the internal clarity that gives you permission you your own personal Rite of passage into sleep. That's the kind of wisdom that comes from being in a new frequency and how this sleep concept can replace problematic thinking with intuitive thinking. Um, I, I know that the concept of breathing as, as a tool for sleeping, that's, everybody's done that. Everybody's used that it's important with sleep concepts to not just do the thing, but actually do it from the viewpoint of it being asleep concept, without connecting to it as a sleep concept, it could have limitations. That limitation is if you just breathe with the hope that this will calm you down so that you can sleep, that sleep didn't teach you how to become a better sleeper. So the next time you do it, it's going to be just as difficult. So it's the sleep concept because it's grounded to sleep biologically. It makes more sense biologically.

And so each time you do it, you're actually improving your skill set as a sleeper. And so if you use that as a sleep concept, you get to be in better rapport with your mind and your body. You get to be the integrator of how sleep takes place on both of those realms. And each time you do it, as you practice these concepts, you become a better sleeper. So if you were being held back right now by your emotions, by your thinking, you have the freedom to switch from this low frequency energy field into a more expansive and loving frequency that has all the answers that you seek, or that will without having to have a dialogue, we'll just feed you what you need to hear and feel so that you can walk through your Rite of passage. And this is something that you get to practice until eventually asleep concept is just something that takes place as an undercurrent.

And I've said before, that's where I am right now. I don't, I don't think about these things 90% of the time. It's these things that have become a part of how I see the process of sleep more biologically, they have allowed sleeping to take place below the activity of thinking and emotions for the most part, for the most part, it's not perfect, but eventually asleep concept is something you practice to get better. And then you could use to get you out of, out of sleep gems. And I just want to say too, that at the root of everything, I never want this message to get lost. And that's that lifestyle has to go along with everything more sun, way less blue light. These things are key when you can combine those two basic things with all the other hygiene pieces, when you can combine those with healthy sleep concepts, eventually that thinking either disappears from the equation or primarily takes place as sleep confidence, which is what I describe as that the friendly, unconscious sleep dialogue that takes place within you. So phone keys, wallet, safety, breathing in thinking inter in you frequency and be different without having to change.

Okay, have great sleep. Falling asleep podcast has been brought to you by normies glasses. Better sleep starts with blocking blue light and nothing blocked to live better than the unnatural light coming from your electronic devices tells your brain that it's daytime and the pineal gland doesn't release the melatonin. You need to sleep. In some cases, this is the only thing preventing people from falling asleep to learn more and start blocking blue light immediately go to dourness. This dot I use the discount code for more information on how to sleep better, please visit

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